A few days back, I got word that Russia’s number one wrestler, Ivan Markov, set out to openly challenge me on Finnish soil. I was in the midst of preparations for my southern rock band Crossfyre’s tour of Poland and Germany, which we left for today, when I heard the news.
A lot of folks who don’t live in Finland probably aren’t aware of the political climate between Finland and Russia in the wake of the EU embargos set forth, following the situation with the Ukraine, or the slant that the media in this country constantly feeds to its citizens about the tensions between our countries. Needless to say, there is a constant picture of an imminent threat to Finland’s independence lingering in the air. Big Russia vs. little Finland.
Ivan “Locomotive” Markov has initiated the first step in the next Cold War!
Anyone who knows anything about Nordic and Baltic world history knows that Finland used to be under Russian rule by the Czar. We are, after all, neighboring lands and Russia’s reach used to far exceed what is today, although they are still the biggest, single country in the world.
Things in Russia have been arguably restless over the past year, as their war with the Ukraine has caused a lot of unrest with neighboring countries and even with the rest of the world. It’s like Reagan vs. Gorbachov all over again, with a new Cold War on the horizon. Only this time, it’s Vladimir Putin against the rest of the world.
In the midst of these troubled times comes one who calls himself the “Locomotive”, Ivan Markov, who is looking to assert himself in the name of his country and leader, in an effort to claim dominance in the name of Mother Russia. Not only does Markov call me out personally, he goes on to spite and belittle the country in which I pioneered the sport of professional wrestling. The same country my parents were born in. This, simply, will not do.
I’ll be honest: Markov reminds me a lot of another Ivan, that being Ivan Drago from the acclaimed ‘80s movie, Rocky IV. If you look at the man, he is an impressive physical specimen. I have no idea what he’s been having for breakfast – if you get my drift – but it sure ain’t what this ol’ boy has been having. I’ve spent 27 years of my life in the gym as a natural athlete, whether healthy or busted up, and I know the difference between organic and non-organic. Markov and Drago… these Ivan’s have a lot in common.
So here I find myself on the road, driving down through the Baltics on my way to Poland for a set of shows with Crossfyre, and I know that I’ll have to be in the shape of my life to face Ivan Markov, because believe you me, I am accepting his challenge for a fight on July 23 in Helsinki! I know I don’t have much time, and the touring schedule and road life doesn’t allow for such luxuries as well-equipped gyms and optimal training hours to give me a platform for preparation.
Training like Sylvester Stallone in Rocky IV, only this time I am in Poland!
Therefore, I left home this morning ready to train on the road, Rocky-style. I took the few training aides that would fit in our jam-packed Crossmobile tour van: a kettlebell, a set of power bands and two 5kg plates with in-built handles. That’s it. Everything else is bodyweight conditioning. Oh, and I even grabbed a few Muscle&Fitness magazines to help keep my head in the game.
Chin-ups in Germany!
Ivan Markov might be younger than me. He might be bigger than me. He might be crazier than me. But there’s one thing he has to know, going into this Finland vs. Russia showdown in Helsinki on July 23.
Markov needs to know what Belgium’s acclaimed Bernard Vandamme – whom I beat for the prestigious Eurostars European championship twice – said about me: “StarBuck was not the biggest guy around, he wasn’t the most agile, and he wasn’t a high-flier, but he had a bit of everything, and he knew how to combine those qualities into one impressive formula for success.”
Ivan Markov should be taking notes. He should be brushing up on his pro wrestling history. He should under no circumstances sell short the caliber of wrestler that he is up against, come July 23. All Ivan Markov needs to do is read one single page on Wikipedia, or look at my contributions and track record in one of the most contested markets for wrestling on the planet, that being Japan. Or then, look at the list of notable names in the wrestling industry that have fallen to “The Rebel” StarBuck simply over the past decade, and then, he will have a more clear understanding of the man that he has chosen to call out.
I found an old barn, made do with whatever was hanging around, and got busy!
When Finland’s Snacky fast food restaurant chain owner Jukka Nieminen heard that Markov had issued a challenge to fight me, he stepped forth, offering a platform for this mega-match to take place. Last year, FCF Wrestling orchestrated an event in Helsinki’s Pukinmäki suburb, along with Snacky and the nation’s leading tabloid magazine, 7 Päivää. That event was called Snacky Slam and this year, Nieminen expressed that he wanted to do it again.
Therefore, on Thursday, July 23 at Snacky in Pukinmäki, Helsinki – outdoors under the sun and free for all to see – I will battle Russia’s top wrestler, Ivan Markov, with both nations’ national pride at stake.
This is going to be one for the ages. The next Cold War!
There are days that just feel haggard when you get older. The body starts to show the signs of wear and tear and you realize there ain’t no way in hell you’re getting your former self back. Today was one of those days for Yours Truly.
Just like everyone else out there, I’ve seen all the bodybuilding and fitness magazines promising “constant development” and shit like that, but let me assure you, that’s a crock. Unless you’re on the gas (steroids) or other performance-enhancers, the body just begins to turn against you at a certain point after you’ve outlived your youth, and believe me when I tell you, then you are just trying to stem the tide anymore.
After wrestling for on top of two decades, one tends to build up a specific list of nagging injuries and physical setbacks. The joints hurt, the body becomes increasingly stiff. Certain ranges of motion induce pain. Then you must push through the pain barrier (unless it serves to inflammate your current state of being) and clear your personal aging hurdles. Because, seriously, what other choices do you have?
That’s not to say that it’s game over when the tipping point arrives, no sir, not at all! Of course, the relevance of a healthy lifestyle and healthy eating habits become all the more pronounced as the years wear on. But there’s more. There comes the pivotal moment, when you have to change your game. You have to dig deeper and play smarter. There is no surcease. There is no cease-fire. I mean, let’s be honest, if you choose to give up when the pain starts to come and the body starts to rebel against its owner, then all you’ll have left to look forward to is a painful and slow death. You absolutely MUST stay in the fight. Quitting is NOT an option.
Believe me, there have been countless times when I just couldn’t have cared less about hitting the track or banging it out another day in the gym. It’s a lot like a long marriage, I guess. There are days that you are sick and tired of it all, and then there are days that make it all worth the while. And at the days end you still know deep down, that if you chose to give up on this chosen path, there would be more negatives that positives waiting for you. Therefore, you choose to persist.
I remember watching the Rocky Balboa movie back in 2008 and feeling inspired even back then at the following motivational clip, which I am really starting to relate to after spending two decades plus in the pro wrestling game…
Let me assure you, life doesn’t feel like the movies. Romance and love do not work in real life like they do in the movies. Fights do not look or feel anything like they are portrayed in the movies. No one has a backing soundtrack in this life. All we have is that little voice deep within our heads and something called heart, or lack thereof. At the end of the day, it’s just sheer willpower and persistence that makes the difference in anyone’s life. Forget talk of motivation. Do not wait for someone or something to motivate you. YOU have to go out there and make it happen! Remember, there are no such things as excuses, only reasons why things don’t get done.
People are always looking for the quick fix, the fountain of youth, the magic formula. Allow me to let you in on something: THEY DON’T EXIST. The commercial powers that be have duped you. They’ve lied to you for years. Some of you still believe the sales pitches. Like a good politician herding the sheep in every four years, some folks still want to believe in what may as well be termed “something for nothing.”
The cold, hard truth is: there are no free rides, no easy money, no shortcuts to the goal. There is only hard work, sweat, struggle and persistence.
It’s been brewing for quite awhile now. Since April of this year, a young, brash (albeit beligerant) wrestler by the name of Ricky Vendetta here in Finland has been boasting high and mighty about how he managed to pin a 3-time European wrestling champion in myself.
Vendetta’s hunger to rise to the top in his chosen field cannot be slighted. I was once his age, in the same situation as he finds himself now: hungry and determined, willing to take any risk, regardless of its price tag, to achieve greatness. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: I’m actually honored. Honored to have this young doberman pup come after me, as the oldest dog in the yard, looking to take my mantle. I welcome his challenge, and I will take great personal pride in ripping him apart, as I re-establish to Ricky boy who exactly he has chosen to meddle with.
The thing about young men is this: they become blinded by their ambition. Life has not yet taught them the hardest lessons of all. They are in the learning phase, the educational phase of what it takes to really be called a Man. During this rite of passage, from youth to full adulthood, a young man takes unwitting risks, the kind that will ultimately cost him dearly. I should know. At 41-years of age, I can look back on my own life and see these same lessons scattered about. In hindsight, I can clearly assess what each and every step cost me, what battle scars they left on my being in their wake.
Ricky Vendetta has a world of talent. He has the kind of burning heart for the pro wrestling business that I have seen few exhibit here in Finland, where I am the founding father and pioneer of our grappling game. Over the past 11 years, all the way back to 2003, I can count on one hand the other Finnish contemporaries that have tunnelvisioned and set themselves to succeed and achieve like young Mr. Vendetta. That’s saying alot.
I believe it becomes a literal obligation for mature men to pass down the life lessons that they have learned along this path of mortality to those who are following behind them. It’s called mentorship, and the lack of such in today’s self-serving society is all too obvious. All too many young men, and even grown men, don’t have a damn clue. They wander about aimlessly, not sure of their masculinity, their power, their calling or their talents. It’s sad, really. In this light, those who “have it” are morally obligated to pass it on and educate those who are still searching for their personal pot of gold, potential, or what have you.
Ricky Vendetta is going to learn the hard way what it is like to earn your stripes in this game of life. That lesson will be afforded to him inside of our sacred squared circle, the testing ground of guts and intenstinal fortitude. It’s a place where men are broken, where boys find themselves missing their mothers. It’s a ruthless stage, where the wheat is mercilessly separated from the chaff.
On September 13 in Helsinki at FCF Wrestling’s Syyskuun Selkäsauna event, Ricky Vendetta’s shallow boasts about going over not once, but twice, on the patriarch of Finnish professional wrestling, “The Rebel” StarBuck, will come to an abrupt end. I will not only punish young Ricky, as a father would his son, I will make him submit and scream for his life. This is a personal vendetta.
I just had a flash of visceral clarity today while I was out jogging in the woods. You know, no phone, no Internet, no other voices, no distractions. I just thought to share this moment of clairvoyance with all of you who read my blog.
We live in a day and age of distraction and haze, unlike any other prior in human history. Our brains and minds are overloaded with completely useless information and clutter, with propaganda and worthless entertainment. Much of this, dare I say perhaps nearly all of it, is directly due to our enslavement to technology. In particular, this has to do with the Internet, with smartphones, tablets, PC’s, pads and what have you. Basically anything that keeps a person disconnected with the here and now, live and in living color, in real life. Just think of a group of friends going out on a Saturday night and everyone sitting there, playing with their smartphones.
The sad truth is, that we – and by and in large by this I mean the western, ”free” world – have sold ourselves to the slavery of virtual existence and viral life. We live vicariously through our computers, deceptively imagining that we are somehow part of a huge, global, online community and that our voice counts for something amongst the masses. How foolish we are.
The truth of the matter is, that our brains are overloaded. Our minds are full of fog. We are kept intentionally distracted from what is really going on behind this all in the world. Like iconic comedian George Carlin (RIP) so prolifically once stated, ”Forget the politicians. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice . . . you don’t. You have no choice. You have owners. They own you. They own everything….It’s a big club and you ain’t in it. You and I are not in The big club. By the way, it’s the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. All day long beating you over the head with their media telling you what to believe, what to think and what to buy. The table has tilted folks. The game is rigged and nobody seems to notice. Nobody seems to care.”
Fear is the single greatest motivator in the history of mankind. Moreso than love, fear makes people act. Organized religion knows this, the governments know this, global corporations know this. Like acclaimed lifecoach Anthony Robbins so aptly stated, ”We all make decisions based on two forces, and that is to avoid pain and to gain pleasure.”
People are more hedonistic now that at perhaps any time before in world history. Perhaps an argument can be made for Ancient Rome before its fall, but I dare say nowadays we are even more self-indulgent, based on the fact that we are more effectively sold the illusion of luxury and status through the virtual and advertising world and media at large. We are made to want and aspire after things that we don’t even really want in and of ourselves, nor do we need them. Useless clutter. Stuff. Shit to fill up the empty spaces in our lives.
We have come to a day and age of learned helplessness, a chosen self-defeat. We fall back on the excuse that nothing is our fault directly, we can always pass the blame on to someone else, and something or someone doesn’t please us – BANG! Out they go, right out the window. We are a society sick on our own self-indulgence. It’s the grand day of ”me, me me.” Trust me when I tell you, there ain’t no room for ”you” when it’s all about ”me.” No wonder relationships never last nowadays.
This society so desperately needs a strong, swift kick in the proverbial ass that would snap everyone out of their secular haze. Nothing around us is as it seems. Everything is doctored to suit someone else’s bigger purpose at large. Everyone knows that they can’t do much about it, so we just fall back into accepting our fate. How the civilzations of old would mock and scorn us! Speaking only of the vikings, I believe they would have no mercy on our pathetic state of affairs.
The bottom line is: YOU are 100% responsible for your life. At the end of it all, you cannot shift the blame to anyone else for what you have done or left undone. You cannot play the victim and expect anything to change for the better. You will answer and pay the price, or conversely reap the rewards, of your own choices and actions. The bitch of a fact in this whole deal is that you can’t even remain neutral or ride the fence, without taking a side or moving forward, because time keeps ticking away, and stagnancy only results in death. Just think of a cancer cell, if left untreated or unremoved. At the end of the day, no one else is responsible for your life: you alone make it or break it. As the old saying in Finland goes, you are ”the blacksmith of your own destiny.”
It takes personal responsibility to activate empowerment in one’s life. It takes you and I saying, ”I am responsible at least in part for what has happened to me, and I will make the effort to change things.” I am not speaking on high from a soapbox here. I can only call it for what it is, recognizing our collective predicament. I just have clarity. And along with the knowledge that comes with clarity comes the responsibility and obligation to do something with that insight. Having the cure for cancer and keeping it all to yourself will not help anybody in the end.
It’s time to snap out of it. Time to realize that we have been fed a big, long line of bullshit. We have become willfully ignorant, believing that our chosen ignorance will become bliss. Forget viral culture and virtual lives, it’s time to go out there and become active.
In closing, to paraphrase something from acclaimed author Anthony De Mello, ”If you have ears to hear what I just said, then great. If not, woe is you.”
When you look back on the best times and highlights of your life, one tends to wax emotional.
Yesterday, the Japanese sporting press announced the end of WNC (Wrestling New Classic) and its merger with Keiji Mutoh’s Wrestle-1 organization. From WNC’s roster, Tajiri, Akira Nogami, Rionne Fujiwara, Yusuke Kodama, Koji Doi and Jiro Kuroshio join the Wrestle-1 roster. Everyone else becomes a free agent. I was the second last champion for WNC (Bernard Vandamme of Belgium is the current and final titleholder), and was with the company since its inception in April 2012.
Yours Truly as WNC champion (photo by Marko Simonen)
Time for a reality check. We are living in hard times, and it honestly doesn’t look like it’s going to get any easier, globally speaking. The rich keep getting richer, those with less are losing even that which they have, and the the big are eating up the small. Mergers are the business word of the day, be it Time-Warner or Microsoft swallowing up Nokia. At the end of it all, it all boils down to money; those who have it and those who don’t. The financial crunch that has burdened much of the world over the past several years certainly isn’t helping.
When I look back on my time with WNC, I reminisce with fondness. I made a friend, a great friend, in Akira Nogami. Along with Akira and Japanese kickboxing and multiple-time women’s pro wrestling champion Syuri Kondou, I was part of the coolest rebel unit to hit Japan in ages in Synapse. We wrecked havoc, took names and kicked volumes of ass. I still fondly recall my first teaming with Akira and Syuri against Tajiri, Hajime Ohara and Kana back in on August 2, 2012 in Tokyo. It was a hard-hitting, feisty brawl from start to finish, and during the melee, Tajiri kicked one of my front teeth out. Battle scars, medals of honor. No hard feelings, of course, just business as usual in the modern day arena of the gladiators. It was Tajiri’s sister’s dental office in southern Kagoshima, that even fixed my missing lego at the end of that tour. I remember the barbed wire matches that Synapse had with Tajiri, Kana and Mikey Whipwreck … matches that definitely had you on the edge of your seat, as everyone tried their damndest to keep from being mangled by the barbed wire sticking out of the boards in the corners of the ring. I recall the outings against various three-opponent trifectas around Japan, all of whom we put down and convincingly so. Then, as my last, great memory from my time with WNC, I remember February 27 of this year, when I beat Tajiri himself for the WNC championship title in Tokyo in one of the hardest slobberknocking matches of my career.
The first ever teaming of Synapse (all photos by WNC)
I want to publicly thank WNC and especially main man Tajiri himself for giving me the golden opportunity to wrestle for their company over the past couple of years that they were in existence. It has been a hell of a ride. Thank you Akira, my brother, for your friendship. Thank you Syuri, for your warm smiles. Thank you Yusuke Kodama, Rionne Fujiwara, Nozomu Matsuzawa and all of the young boys and girls of the WNC roster.
Once again, the words of King Solomon from Ecclesiastes chapter 3 come to pass:
“For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted; a time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up; a time to weep, and a time to laugh; a time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing; a time to seek, and a time to lose; a time to keep, and a time to cast away; a time to tear, and a time to sew; a time to keep silence, and a time to speak; a time to love, and a time to hate; a time for war, and a time for peace.”
After a hellacious night of wrestling warfare in Helsinki this past weekend at the biggest yearly event in Finnish professional wrestling, I found myself losing … and losing big!
I entered the event with my head held high, a dual-champion, representing both Britain and Japan. However, after the dust had settled, I left the ring dejected, having lost both the BWA Catchweight title to Valentine, as well as the WNC championship to Bernard Vandamme. To add salt to my wounds, I also lost the services of my wife, Miss D, as my ringside valet, since the stipulation in the match with Valentine was that should I lose the match (and BWA title), my wife’s career would also be on the line. In other words, FCF Wrestling’s Talvisota VIII was a royal flush for me … right down the proverbial shitter.
Firstly, the long-awaited Stretcher Match that I had with Valentine was a war that I gladly accepted and looked forward to. After the match, his face was marred and his front tooth chipped, after all that he and his Bättre Folk cohorts instigated against my wife and I over the past year. This was a bittersweet revenge for me, and although I lost the match, which could only end in a pinfall, I gained my measure of retribution. Valentine used a foreign object, which I heard were brass knuckles, on my ribs, and in the end, threw salt into my eyes before nailing his Code Breaker finsiher to pin me down for the win. After I was able to shake the stinging from my eyes, I paid Valentine back in spades, piledriving him three times – two of those head-first on a steel chair. Valentine was carted out of the ring with his newly-acquired BWA title draped unceremoniously across his prone carcass. Miss D even got her own personal comeuppance against Valentine’s Bättre Folk valet, Barbie, slapping the devious wench to the canvas after the match. I was happy over all of the dished out retribution, even in defeat.
However, my WNC title defense against Belgium’s powerhouse Bernard Vandamme was an even more bitter pill for me. I was battle-weary, but Vandamme demanded his match immediately after I duelled Valentine. With the heart of a hero, there was no way I was backing down. I fought with all I had, but Vandamme was fresh, and he laid the heat on hard and heavy. It took just under two-minutes for my assailant to score the victory, with an Oklahoma Stampede powerslam. Lo and behold, in one fell swoop, wihtin one night, I lost two championships.
Now, in this life, there is no up without the down, no happiness without sadness, and no good without evil. Everything is relative, in addition: the higher you climb, the further down you have to fall. After reaching the pinnacle, the top of the mountain, the only way is down. No one stays on top forever.
So now, in the face of this monumental, personal defeat at Talvisota VIII, starts the climb back up the mountain for this wayfaring, battle-worn ring veteran. But mark my words, I will rise like a phoenix from the ashes. My ego and spirit are too strong to be denied.
It wasn’t only me, that suffered a crushing loss at Talvisota VIII. The FCF Wrestling championship changed hands at the event, as the incredibly-popular champion Tuho Torvinen lost his prestigious title to ”Wildman” Heimo Ukonselkä. Ukonselkä played a very aggressive and dirty game against Torvinen, laying the champion out with the butt of his battle axe, which is a part of the Wildman’s gimmick regalia during his ring entrances. Torvinen’s bell was visibly wrung, and the man was never able to fully regain his senses and sustain a prolonged flurry of offense. In just over 10-minutes, Ukonselkä countered Torvinen’s football tackle charge, nailing the champion with a powerful big boot to the face, after which the winning pinfall was academic.
Perhaps the lesson to be learned here is, that as Iron Maiden once sang, ”The evil that men do lives on and on.”
Yet, like a phoenix, the good will rise from the ashes. Just watch us.
Looking back on my extensive wrestling career, I can say I’ve had a lot of great opponents. Some of those opponents have offered me feuds to remember for a lifetime, matches that I will one day tell my grandchildren about.
Many notable foes come to mind over the years, whom I have had the pleasure of doing battle with: former ECW world champion Steve Corino, ex-GSW champ Michael Kovac, EWA world champion Chris Raaber, my former FCF teammate Hajime Ohara, multi-time Eurostars European champion Bernard Vandamme, former FCF champion Stark Adder, just to name a few. Yet, beyond a shadow of a doubt, the most notorious feud of my wrestling career has been with one “Japanese Buzzsaw” Yoshihiro Tajiri.
Tajiri is, without question, the most persistent adversary I have ever fought. We have duked it out over the FCF championship – putting that title on the map globally as one of the top trophies in our industry today – on a couple of memorable occasions; we have fought over the SMASH championship, which I won in a tournament final in Tokyo, defeating Tajiri in 2011; and now, on February 27 in Tokyo once again, I will face Tajiri for the WNC championship, should he retain his title after a defense against Hiro Tonai on February 23, just days before our showdown.
There’s something to be said for Tajiri as a trailblazer and main mover in the wrestling industry. The man is undoubtedly the most prominent Japanese star in WWE history, being well-featured for nearly six-years and Smackdown and Raw broadcasts, having held the WWE US, WWE Cruiserweight and WWE tag team championships. Tajiri’s trademark kicks have become the stuff of legend, and his famous Buzzsaw Kick has given me more headaches than I care to remember. The man has a brilliant mind, and is one of the smartest people that I have come across in our industry. I have a lot of respect for Yoshihiro Tajiri, and I believe the feeling is mutual.
Now, on February 27 at Shinjuku Face arena in Tokyo, once again, it will be another chapter in the ongoing war between Tajiri and myself. I still clearly remember a couple of concussions that this man gave to me in the heat of battle, in 2010 and 2013. Tajiri kicked one of my front teeth out of my mouth in 2012, which is something that is hard to forget. We have beat each other from pillar to post, from Europe to Asia, and we are still at it, four years after it all began at FCF Wresting’s Talvisota IV event back on February 20, 2010 in Helsinki.
The night that it all began in Helsinki, Talvisota VI (photo by Kari Helenius)
I personally highly look forward to this next encounter with “The Japanese Buzzaw”. I sincerely hope he retains his WNC title against Hiro Tonai on February 23, because I need to pay Tajiri back for some of the damage that he did to me previously, as aforementioned.
When I was young, just like any boy, I had my heroes. These were male role models that I looked up to, icons of strength and heroism. Actually, I think that those two attributes and characteristics resound in any young boy’s psyche, regardless of the convoluted and gender-confused age that we live in modern days.
My first heroes were The Incredible Hulk (both the Lou Ferrigno TV version and the Marvel comics version), Godzilla and Conan The Barbarian (both the Arnold Schwarzenegger movie version and the Marvel comics version). Very soon thereafter, however, I discovered pro wrestling’s Hulk Hogan. Let me tell you, as a kid, nothing was more real and more potent as a tangible idol than Hulk Hogan. I recall watching mesmerized in front of our old, snowy television set in Thunder Bay, Ontario, watching Hulk Hogan battle the likes of Nikolai Volkoff and King Kong Bundy on late night Saturday Night’s Main Event broadcasts on the NBC station. I was sold for life, marking the beginnings of my foray into the wonderous world of professional wrestling, a journey along which I found many more icons and tangible heroes. Whether it was a Canadian wrestling star like Dan Kroffat or Steve Strong out of Montreal’s International Wrestling scene, or American stars like Ric Flair, The Road Warriors or Bam Bam Bigelow, I had discovered real life heroes that resonated with me at my very core.
I recall drawing detailed, color portraits of guys like Bigelow and Flair, and at specific wrestling events, I would boldly walk up to the promoter or agents prior to the event and tell them that I would like to present my artwork in person to the star. NWA promoter Gary Juster allowed me behind the curtain in Boston, Mass. to meet Bigelow, whereas arena security in Calgary at the Saddledome allowed me the chance to meet Flair. As a kid, those were milestone moments, where I got to even fleetingly meet my heroes for real. I have no idea if those stars ever retained or treasured the artwork that I drew of them, but as you all can see from the Artwork link here at my website, I am a very proficient graphic artist with an extensive resume nowadays. I was pretty damn good back then, too, even if I say so myself.
Tom Zenk (left) and Dan Kroffat (right) mug for the TV cameras with Milt Avruskin interviewing
As I became a professional wrestler myself, actively starting my in-ring career in 1994, I purposed myself to become more than just a plagarized copy of my heroes: no, indeed, I would become an original. Once I found my groove in terms of my wrestling style and persona, the doors opened up for me. I became one of the most popular wrestlers in all of Italy over 2005, so much so that the promoter even noted it in front of the entire locker room. I became one of the most loved foreign bad guys to ever frequent Norway from 2003 onwards. Girls would bring “StarBuck is a starf*ck!” signs to the shows, which, of course, I plead innocence to! I would become one of the most popular foreign stars in all of the country of Japan in 2011, a buzz that lives on even to this day. In Finland, I have become an icon of the country’s pop culture fabric, due to my contribution above all in professional wrestling, and secondly as a rock vocalist, fronting my various bands over the years.
Streamers thrown into the ring are a sign of popularity in Japan
I recall strapping young lads, like a teenage Mikko Maestro, who now wrestles for FCF in Finland, run into me while jogging seaside, telling he’s a big fan. I recall wrestling in Tallinn, Estonia in 2007 and making such an impact on one young fan, that he turned away from partying, drugs and alcohol, choosing to follow my example. I recall signing loads of autographs for sick children at a special charity wrestling match at the American Car Show in Helsinki in 2009, with broad smiles on those children’s faces. I recall my numerous trips to Japan, where fans have eagerly treated me to the finest restaurant meals, presented me with spectacular gifts and cheered me on in the ring unlike any other audience prior or since. In short, I reached my goal and fulfilled my aspiration of becoming not just an original, but a hero to others myself. For this, I am extremely proud … in a good way.
When my wife last visited her homeland of Romania and gave one of my signed photos to an 11-year-old kid there, I was told that he looks forward to the day that he can take a picture with me and mug together for the camera. All he has is YouTube and the Internet to follow my wrestling exploits, but for him, that is suffice. To know that I have made an indelible impact on a complete stranger like that, who doesn’t even have the opportunity to see live wrestling events, speaks volumes.
Looking back on my career and lifetime contribution, I know that I have done something right, knowing somewhere out there, I am somebody’s hero.
Well, today is the last day of the year. A fitting time to look back on the tumultuous year that has been 2013.
Personally speaking, it’s been the hardest year on many fronts in my life to date. Sure, I’ve had both good and bad this year, but the dark side casts a major shadow on what has been 2013. Some economic seers were predicting a shitstorm for this past year at the tail end of 2012, and lo and behold, that shitstorm came with sinister fury. Financially, 2013 was a horrendous year. The sooner forgotten, the better. I really have no idea what is going to stem the tide and turn the course of the economy and job market, but something needs to happen — big time. Maybe it’s just the foreboding clouds of impending doom that forecast the doing away with of cash money, moving society towards a total digital transaction empire. Maybe it’s the speedy dissolvement of the middle class, ushering in a greater disparity between the those who have and those who have not. Maybe it’s the last, great rush of the greedy and self-centered, the liars and the thieves, to capitalize on the few remaining remnants of everyone else’s piece of pie. Whatever it is, it’s come to not only reach, but exceed the limit. Stop already!
But yeah, there has been good in this past year, also. I started 2013 off with a surprise engagement to my sweetheart, Diana, at a wrestling show in Lohja, Finland on January 4. After my match against Ricky Vendetta, I took the house mic and proposed in center ring to my girl, leading to our marriage on March 13 in Espoo, Finland. Diana told me that both numbers 3 and 13 have always had a lucky significance for her during her life, and it was her wish that we tie the knot on 13.3.2013. It took me almost 40 years to reach marriage, but dammit, I finally found my diamond in the rough and took the head-first plunge!
My parents pose with my brand spanking new wife and I
In March, I had the honor of representing my homeland of Canada in the Four Continents Cup of 2013 in Brugge, Belgium. The match was a four-man random tag elimination bout, with wrestlers also representing Spain (Europe), Japan (Asia) and Ecuador (South America). In the end, it boiled down to myself and Makoto Morimitsu of Japan, with my foe escaping my finishing piledriver attempt, capturing me in a rolling side cradle hold for the pinfall and win. It was a hard-fought match that was eight years in the making, as I had originally faced Makoto in Italy back in 2005, where I left him laying the ring after my spike piledriver.
StarBuck piledrives Makoto in the Four Continents Cup
I got to the critical age of 40 this past year, back on April 24. My wife organized a surprise birthday party for me at my old friend and ex-Stoner Kings drummer Janne Kontoniemi’s Bar Chaplin in downtown Helsinki. It was nice to see so many people turn up for the occasion. That said, it really feels like at 40, my life may as well be half over. I’ve been able to “live the dream”, as the boys call it in pro wrestling when one is able to enjoy a good modicum of success, rock all over the world with several of the bands I’ve fronted in, create characters with SONY music sensation Hevisaurus that have turned into a smash-hit all across Finland with kids far and wide, and a whole hoopla of other stuff.
Yet, somehow at the milestone age of 40, all of this feels somewhat … empty. It’s strange. When you think, that in the end, all you have ahead of you is an endless eternity that you cannot cancel out on, even if you’d have hoped, it all just becomes so very strange. The words from my band Overnight Sensation’s song Fool Like You resound in my head: “If I could, I’d return to the womb … way the hell back to nothing, before I even set to bloom.” Maybe it’s the hardships over the past year, but it makes one somber and philosophical.
In the Spring of 2013, I had the honor of facing WNC (Wrestling New Classic) champion, Osamu Nishimura, as part of a spectacular tag team main event in Tokyo, where I was paired up with my Synapse teammates AKIRA and Syuri against TAJIRI, Nishimura and WNC women’s champion Lin Byron. My good friend, heart surgeon Dr. Hiroaki Terasaki, claimed that this was the best match that I had wrestled in Japan in his opinion. I must say, that working against Nishimura in that match left me hoping I would have gotten a singles title match against the man over the course of this year. However, the financial hardships that are troubling the west are also now being felt harshly in the east, and I didn’t get the chance to grapple solely against Nishimura, as he dropped the title to TAJIRI this past summer.
A show of respect between WNC Champ Nishimura and myself after our match.
On May 11 in Espoo, Finland, I captured the BWA (British Wrestling Alliance) Catchweight title from Valentine, gaining a measure of revenge on my adversary for attacking my wife a couple of months earlier at an event in Helsinki. My victory was bittersweet, as I had promised not only to take the title, but to send Valentine out on a stretcher for good measure. I didn’t get to collect on the stretcher ride portion of it all, but that receipt is still coming, be assured of that.
2013 was a hard year also in the way of physical injuries, particularly the herniated disc between my C6-C7 vertebrae, which was diagnosed in mid-August. I had been experiencing numbing pain in my upper left shoulderblade/trapezius/arm, and I am talking 24/7 pain that just wouldn’t relent. I finally could take no more, and I went to one of Finland’s most highly-regarded sports physicians, Dr. Tuomo Karila, who had been the doctor for the Finnish wrestling team in the last Olympics. That is when I understood the severity of my condition. Had I continued to wrestle, especially in a highly-anticipated match against 190kg Cannonball Grizzly at the end of the summer, I would have risked paralysis. I tried to snake my way out of a match in Gothenburg, Sweden, against local hero Conny Mejsel, but the President of GBG Wrestling, Lady Delores, demanded that I wrestle. I was given a substitute, as I declined the hard challenge that Mejsel would surely present, and in lieu, I faced masked man Aguila Roja. I trounced Roja, as I was irate that GBG wouldn’t let me sit the match out, due to my aggrevated injury, but at the end of it all, Mejsel appeared to save the day. I beat Mejsel bloody with a folding chair, paying him back for conniving against me with the Bättre Folk contingent in FCF Wrestling back in the summer of 2013 in Helsinki at one event. When I am fully healed, I will be more than glad to face Conny Mejsel, be it in Sweden or in Finland or any place for that matter. All that said, I have still not fully recovered from my herniated disc, as of December 31 today, as I get pins and needles from time to time in my left index finger from the damage done to my disc. Deadlifts, chin-ups and back squats are off limits for another three to four months, as this thing has to get properly healed up.
I got some good news from Oskari Pastila, the director of my Spandex Sapiens documentary movie. Originally, the movie was slated to be out in January 2014, but lo and behold, the flick just kept getting more and more funding, which meant that more and more people were getting involved. This of course meant that the release date of the film had to be pushed back to either Spring 2014 or Autumn 2014, since the summer vacation months do not warrant putting anything notable out. So, for all of you who have been asking and wondering, now you know the lowdown on the situation.
In September, I returned to action in England for the first time in thirteen years at an event in Gloucester, entitled Wrestling Rampage. I faced local hero Matt Jarrett aka The English Bulldog, dropping him with my trademark spike piledriver to get the duke in under 10-minutes of combat, as Jarrett suffered a neck injury during the course of our bout. I was even asked to go to BBC studios, promoting our match-up prior to the event, which I thought was very cool, in addition to making local newspaper headlines.
The Citizen newspaper runs a big piece on my UK match
September also signalled the release of my hard rock band Overnight Sensation‘s Life’s a Bitch album, which was released solely as a digital record in todays Internet market. It’s sad to say, but by and in large, it seems that the day and age of the CD as a salable item is in its twilight period. So much of everyone’s business has become virtual, that it’s downright scary. Still, I am damn proud of the end result with Life’s a Bitch, which is a very catchy and solid rock album.
I got to play director on my southern rock act Crossfyre‘s Devil’s Daughter music video, which I also did the storyboard and wrote the story for. My wife even got a sponsorship for the girls in the video through mineral make-up company, Gaya Cosmetics. The end result was stellar, as you can witness from the official video.
All in all, 2013 doesn’t sound too bad from the highlights mentioned above, but in many other ways, especially financially, this year is not one that I would like to revisit, outside of a few peak moments. Only God knows what 2014 holds in store, as right now, it’s just a black hole with a huge question mark at the end of it.
Nonetheless, thanks to all my fans and supporters for keeping the faith alive and flame burning over the past year! Let’s keep our thumbs up for 2014…
Having wrestled on 20 trips already in the ”Promised Land” of pro wrestling, Japan, I thought to scribe a piece regarding the cultural impact and significance of Puroresu (pro wrestling in Japanese) on the social and pop culture landscape of not just Japan, but the world in general. After all, were it not for New Japan wrestlers Akira Maeda and Satoru Sayama breaking off in the mid-’80s and forming their UWF promotion in Japan, there certainly would have been no RINGS or Pancrase to jumpstart the MMA craze that has been blazing worldwide for many years now. Truth be told, the entire MMA scene, UFC included, can thank Japanese pro wrestling for their scimilating impact on the fighting business in general.
Going back to ancient Rome, the gladiators of old would reenact famous battles of lore, by dressing up in gimmicks and thereby producing very visual storytelling through their art of battle for the screaming fans of the coliseum. The most famous and loved gladiators were protected to a great degree by the emperors and promoters of their day. The action-hungry audiences at the coliseums had their distinct favorites, and some of the gladiators could even retire alive from active competition, if they lived to see the end of their fighting careers. If a gladiator managed to retire, he would live the rest of his life in luxury, reaping the rewards of his earned fame.
In this way, professional wrestling is the natural extension and lineage of the gladiators of ancient Rome. After all, there is no other game or sport in which the competitor must ”woo” their audience, and specifically engineer and draw a desired reaction from their viewers. Just like in the old days of Rome, the success of the fighter is still, to this day, completely dependent on the relationship and interaction that the wrestler has with their audience. A boxer does not trap his opponent in the ring corner, and then turn to the crowd to ask if they would like to see him hit his opponent, but a wrestler can, and will, do exactly that. In doing so, the professional wrestler draws his audience emotionally much deeper into his matches, as compared to a boxer or mixed martial artist, who simply focuses solely on his opponent during the match.
In this way, pro wrestling becomes the ”Sport of Kings”, because it mixes the perfect balance of theatrical flamboyance in regards to the characters themselves and hard-hitting, fighting aptitude. Pro wrestling is simply more entertaining to watch than any single other fighting art: There is more variety in the movements, techniques and flow of the match, than compared to any other combat style. The chess-like element of utilizing ring psychology to build a compelling match that builds towards a passionate and dramatic crescendo is a very demanding artform and very few are masters at it. In this way, professional wrestling is the finest and most intricate, psychological fighting art of them all.
In mixed martial arts, the combatants are solely interested and focused on ending the match as quickly and effectively as possible. This does not always make for a very interesting or emotionally compelling fight. Even nowadays in the UFC, there are many more pro wrestling-like elements to the matches and fighters themselves, as compared to the past. UFC fighters like Chael Sonnen sound like reincarnations of wrestlers like ”Superstar” Billy Graham when doing promos. Some UFC fighters even play to the crowd, just like pro wrestlers do, during the course of their matches. 10 – 15 years ago this phenomenon would have been unheard of, or perhaps even balked at.
In our modern day and age, mythology is rapidly disappearing from our western culture. In the past, mythology was handed down from generation to generation, as a kind of parable of lessons to be learned in life, plus it always featured the ever-present battle between good and evil in mankind. Nowadays, Hollywood and the movie industry offers little in the way of actual substance, instead opting to try and fill the viewer’s emotional register through special effects, multiple camera angles, quick editing cuts and flimsy but funny dialog. In the process, our culture is losing its grip on true heroism and real life icons. In the movies, everyone is a fictional character, and even Arnold Schwarzenegger is not the same character in The Terminator as he is in Conan the Barbarian. Therefore, the movies do not offer actual heroes or icons, but instead they offer virtual, imaginary heroes and icons. This is where professional wrestling comes in to save the day in our modern age.
In no other game or sport are there such strong characters, as in the world of professional wrestling. When people witness the charisma and passion of Rikidozan, Antonio Inoki, Hulk Hogan, The Rock, ”Stone Cold” Steve Austin or perhaps even good ol’ StarBuck, what they are seeing is the real thing. The character is real, the passion is real and the charisma is real. Even though the professional wrestler might have an extravagant artist name (such as Hulk Hogan, The Great Muta or StarBuck), it stands to argue that the person behind the character name is as real as real gets.
The Great Muta clamps on a headlock
Sometimes people ask me how much of my wrestling persona behind StarBuck is a made-up, fictional image. I tell them: ”None of it!”. I am not acting or pretending to be something that I am not inside of that ring. I only take my personal strengths and turn up the volume to the maximum level in terms of those traits, to make my wrestling persona even more effective. Yet, the man you see in the ring fighting is the real me.
I know that there are many gimmick wrestlers in our business who do not portray their actual selves. Doink the Clown and Eugene in WWE are good examples of this: one is not a true circus clown and the other is not a mentally handicapped person. The Undertaker is not a living dead man. In the same way, I know of big time rock musicians who drink non-alcoholic beer on stage in front of their fans, only to project the image of them being hard drinkers and party animals, while the truth is very different and they might be family men with children at home. Yet, I am not talking about the gimmick wrestlers in my underlying argument here.
Rikidozan – the pioneer and founding father of Puroresu
In Japan, we have seen very many ”real life heroes” throughout the years in the professional wrestling business. Men like Rikidozan, Inoki, Baba, Tenryu, Fujinami, Misawa, Mutoh, Hiroshi Hase and countless others have undoubtedly portrayed their real personas inside of the ring. In the same way, famous gaijin talents like Stan Hansen, Dick Murdoch, Dynamite Kid, Terry Funk and many others have also portrayed their ”real me” personas inside of that ring. In this way, professional wrestlers are the modern day equivalents of iconic heroes of lore. We are modern day gladiators. In this role, as modern day fighting icons with strong, cultural, real life characters, we safeguard and uphold the tradition of the ever-burning battle between good and evil, and this in turn makes us the heirs of traditional mythology in modern times.
There are many lessons to be learned from professional wrestling, and it is no light matter that our game is aptly said to be the ”Sport of Kings”, for we, as professional wrestlers, are the Kings of Sport!
Long live our tradition and mythology – SOU DESU NE!
starbuck.fi 
A new Cold War?
Posted: June 25, 2015 in Entertainment, Professional Wrestling, Social commentaryTags: Cold War, Finland, Ivan Drago, Ivan Markov, Pro Wrestling, Rocky IV, Russia, Snacky Slam, StarBuck, Sylvester Stallone
A few days back, I got word that Russia’s number one wrestler, Ivan Markov, set out to openly challenge me on Finnish soil. I was in the midst of preparations for my southern rock band Crossfyre’s tour of Poland and Germany, which we left for today, when I heard the news.
A lot of folks who don’t live in Finland probably aren’t aware of the political climate between Finland and Russia in the wake of the EU embargos set forth, following the situation with the Ukraine, or the slant that the media in this country constantly feeds to its citizens about the tensions between our countries. Needless to say, there is a constant picture of an imminent threat to Finland’s independence lingering in the air. Big Russia vs. little Finland.
Ivan “Locomotive” Markov has initiated the first step in the next Cold War!
Anyone who knows anything about Nordic and Baltic world history knows that Finland used to be under Russian rule by the Czar. We are, after all, neighboring lands and Russia’s reach used to far exceed what is today, although they are still the biggest, single country in the world.
Things in Russia have been arguably restless over the past year, as their war with the Ukraine has caused a lot of unrest with neighboring countries and even with the rest of the world. It’s like Reagan vs. Gorbachov all over again, with a new Cold War on the horizon. Only this time, it’s Vladimir Putin against the rest of the world.
In the midst of these troubled times comes one who calls himself the “Locomotive”, Ivan Markov, who is looking to assert himself in the name of his country and leader, in an effort to claim dominance in the name of Mother Russia. Not only does Markov call me out personally, he goes on to spite and belittle the country in which I pioneered the sport of professional wrestling. The same country my parents were born in. This, simply, will not do.
I’ll be honest: Markov reminds me a lot of another Ivan, that being Ivan Drago from the acclaimed ‘80s movie, Rocky IV. If you look at the man, he is an impressive physical specimen. I have no idea what he’s been having for breakfast – if you get my drift – but it sure ain’t what this ol’ boy has been having. I’ve spent 27 years of my life in the gym as a natural athlete, whether healthy or busted up, and I know the difference between organic and non-organic. Markov and Drago… these Ivan’s have a lot in common.
So here I find myself on the road, driving down through the Baltics on my way to Poland for a set of shows with Crossfyre, and I know that I’ll have to be in the shape of my life to face Ivan Markov, because believe you me, I am accepting his challenge for a fight on July 23 in Helsinki! I know I don’t have much time, and the touring schedule and road life doesn’t allow for such luxuries as well-equipped gyms and optimal training hours to give me a platform for preparation.
Training like Sylvester Stallone in Rocky IV, only this time I am in Poland!
Therefore, I left home this morning ready to train on the road, Rocky-style. I took the few training aides that would fit in our jam-packed Crossmobile tour van: a kettlebell, a set of power bands and two 5kg plates with in-built handles. That’s it. Everything else is bodyweight conditioning. Oh, and I even grabbed a few Muscle&Fitness magazines to help keep my head in the game.
Chin-ups in Germany!
Ivan Markov might be younger than me. He might be bigger than me. He might be crazier than me. But there’s one thing he has to know, going into this Finland vs. Russia showdown in Helsinki on July 23.
Markov needs to know what Belgium’s acclaimed Bernard Vandamme – whom I beat for the prestigious Eurostars European championship twice – said about me: “StarBuck was not the biggest guy around, he wasn’t the most agile, and he wasn’t a high-flier, but he had a bit of everything, and he knew how to combine those qualities into one impressive formula for success.”
Ivan Markov should be taking notes. He should be brushing up on his pro wrestling history. He should under no circumstances sell short the caliber of wrestler that he is up against, come July 23. All Ivan Markov needs to do is read one single page on Wikipedia, or look at my contributions and track record in one of the most contested markets for wrestling on the planet, that being Japan. Or then, look at the list of notable names in the wrestling industry that have fallen to “The Rebel” StarBuck simply over the past decade, and then, he will have a more clear understanding of the man that he has chosen to call out.
I found an old barn, made do with whatever was hanging around, and got busy!
When Finland’s Snacky fast food restaurant chain owner Jukka Nieminen heard that Markov had issued a challenge to fight me, he stepped forth, offering a platform for this mega-match to take place. Last year, FCF Wrestling orchestrated an event in Helsinki’s Pukinmäki suburb, along with Snacky and the nation’s leading tabloid magazine, 7 Päivää. That event was called Snacky Slam and this year, Nieminen expressed that he wanted to do it again.
Therefore, on Thursday, July 23 at Snacky in Pukinmäki, Helsinki – outdoors under the sun and free for all to see – I will battle Russia’s top wrestler, Ivan Markov, with both nations’ national pride at stake.
This is going to be one for the ages. The next Cold War!