Posts Tagged ‘FCF Wrestling’

The time for talk is OVER.

This coming Saturday, December 2 in Helsinki at Teatteri Forum, the most anticipated match in 14 years of Finnish professional wrestling history will take place.  I hope Juhana “King Kong” Karhula is fit, able and ready, because at FCF Wrestling’s Talvisota XII that night, he’s going to have to savor every moment.

Why, you ask?

Because he has expressly stated, that FCF Wrestling is not big enough for the both of us.  One of us has to go.  We simply cannot co-exist.

Well, if Juhana Karhula wants someone to leave, he’ll have to call in the cavalry and the national guard, too, ‘cos I ain’t planning on going anywhere, except home that night carrying both the Valhalla Nordic wrestling title that I already wear, along with Karhula’s valued FCF championship.  That’s right, it’s winner take all.

Anybody who wants a background check on why this is the most important and significant match in Finnish wrestling history only needs to read our respective blogs here on WordPress to understand why this rivalry is so damned personal.  I’ve simply taken too many knives in the back from this politicking snake and he’s never been able to stomach the sight of me, even from the onset of his career 12 years ago.

main event

December 2, 2017 is going to mark the day when the greatest power shift in Finnish pro wrestling took place.  After the fact, people will write about it in the annals of grappling history, and rightfully so.

Every person reading this should be on hand to witness a definitive key turning point in our professional wrestling culture this coming Saturday night at Teatteri Forum in downtown Helsinki.  Missing out would be like missing Metallica on their last-ever farewell gig.

Talvisota XII is ready to go down in squared circle lore.  The clock is ticking.

Karhula, savor ever damn last moment.

Talvisota XII card

Charles Darwin had a theory that was adopted by the science and world at large, known as ”survival of the fittest.” Counting down the clock to Talvisota XII, the biggest annual pro wrestling event of them all in Finland, this theory somehow comes to mind.

I’ve seen FCF champion Juhana Karhula posting all kinds of updates on social media, claiming he is prepping himself with a boatload of cardio to get into match shape in less than two weeks on December 2 in Helsinki, when the bell rings. Well, I’ve got news for Karhula: that gameplan ain’t gonna save you.

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While Karhula has youth on his side, I have experience. I’ve been through all the wars imaginable inside of that ring, since 1994. I’ve gone in sick, hurt and tired beyond belief. And guess what? I haven’t just survived… I’ve overcome. That’s just one of the idiosyncrasies that makes ”The Rebel” StarBuck the most successful, celebrated, over-achieving professional wrestler in the Nordic wrestling history. Did you hear that? IN HISTORY.

Karhula claims that FCF Wrestling isn’t big enough for both of us, that one of us has to go. Well, guess what, Karhula? I ain’t going anywhere. And certainly not when you dictate.

You wanted the captain’s hat in FCF? Well, you got it. You manipulated and coerced the roster into believing your agenda. Congratulations for mastering the art of being a snake in the grass. You got your desired spot through subterfuge and mutiny. Sounds like a true, modern, millennial leader to me: a sociopath.

Knee strike

Karhula can expect the most hard-hitting aggression on this side of the Atlantic come December 2 at Talvisota XII (photo: Marko Simonen)

I’ve said what’s had to be said. I’ve brought the rot and festering sore inside of FCF to light. Let the people decide who they want to side with. If they want to side with a boy trying to fit into a man’s shoes – a Machiavelian dreamer hungry for personal glory, no matter the cost – then go ahead: take your side with the reigning FCF titleholder, Juhana ”King Kong” Karhula.

On the other hand, if you want true leadership under a man that represents clarity, straight-talk, concise action and no bullshit, along with a track record that speaks volumes to anyone with a brain in their heads, then you will choose the alpha male talking to you right here and now.

First off, however, I will travel to Moscow this coming Saturday, November 25 to defend my Valhalla Nordic Wrestling Championship title against the challenge of Freddy Machete at Russia’s premiere annual pro wrestling supershow, Resliada 2017. I faced Machete in a Fatal Four-way match at the Moscow City Games this past summer, so I have a good inkling of what I’m up against. It should be a kickass event!

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Man, I don’t know about you, but I’m literally counting down the days to Talvisota XII on December 2 in Helsinki. This date features the biggest wrestling event of the year in Finland, and speaking about Talvisota (translating to Winter War for all you non-Finns out there), I pioneered this event concept back in 2006 and I’ve seen it grow into the flagship spectacle it is for Finnish pro wrestling. This is something I’m honestly proud of, in retrospect. Talvisota has become a staple on the Finnish landscape. It’s our equivalent of WWE’s Wrestlemania.

I’ve seen a lot happen over the years, with a lot of ups and downs, and a lot of knives aimed at my back the moment I turned around (many incidents of which are excellently chronicled in my standout autobiography, Battleground Vahalla, available as a hard copy or Kindle version). I’ve shared the dressing room with people that have literally despised the ground I walked on, as well as those I hold in high regard as the scarcely few I can deem a ”brother” in this dog-eat-dog business. That’s all fine and dandy, because I must have made one hell of an indelible impact for this to have taken place! Had I been another bland face in the faceless crowd, no one would have cared and no feathers would have ever been ruffled. That said, that kind of life was never for me.

Of all of the personal issues that I’ve met head-on in the ring, of all the vendettas and grudges that have been settled inside the squared circle, I really don’t think any single one of them has been as weighty as the one that I will face at this coming Talvisota XII on December 2nd against a guy called Juhana ”King Kong” Karhula, who also happens to be the FCF champion at this point in time.

FCF Wrestling May 27th 2017, Helsinki, Finland.

Juhana Karhula

Karhula has always been ambitious, but he hasn’t always been realistic. That said, at times he has also been lazy and nonchalant, a big dreamer. At other times, I think he believed his own hype, a hype that he himself concocted to bolster his lack of self-esteem, and counted himself more of a star than he actually was. He most definitely saw himself as a bigger star than his britches were made for, and it took him several years to get himself up to speed. But when he got with the program, as it were, Karhula became very good. That I’ll give him. The Karhula that steps into the ring nowadays is as well-rounded a pro wrestler as it gets, but as a man, well … that’s a another story.

I recall hearing the echoes on the breeze tell me in recent years of how Karhula saw himself as a better trainer than me, of how he saw his skill level being over and beyond that of mine. When I heard this, I chuckled to myself. I thought that here is a young man, full of piss and vinegar and a load of pipe dreams, trying to convince himself that he’s better than the big daddy of the fold. I whimsically passed it off as youthful bravado and over-ambition.

When I ran the FCF ship for a number of years, I let Karhula take the lead of training the new talents that came in the door. He was hungry to show his worth and he felt up to the task, and so this lot was given to him. He obviously took this as a sign of weakness from me, and proceded to run mutiny with the younger members of the Finnish wrestling fold, poisoning their minds over the past years against the old captain of the ship. My style of old school man-up leadership didn’t sit well with many of the ”boys” (intonation: not quite men yet), who would gripe behind my back about shit but never had the balls to come and talk to me about it. Karhula became the in-between and sponge, as it were, for the gripers, and he used that energy as firepower to cook up his own little mutiny. A man with integrity would have told those gripers to man-up and go talk to the boss directly, just as they have to do with Vince McMahon in WWE. When I look back, the only ”reasoning” I can find for his behavior and choices can be summed up as petty jealousy. Sure, even then, Karhula led others by example: his example only was one of subversion, spinelessness and again, mutiny.

The fact is Juhana Karhula was never better than the man that taught him, even though he does everything in his power to avoid mentioning my name when it comes to who trained him up and who mentored him. Simply put, he hated – and still hates – what he could never be.

Oh, on the surface it looks very different, I’m sure. I’m certain that when most folks look at the way Karhula carries himself and the way he makes his case, they’ll be deluded into falling for the mirage of the ”good guy,” or the ”honest guy.” The cold, hard truth is that Karhula is most definitely NOT a ”good guy.”

Even in one of his last blogs, Karhula tried to paint this picture of FCF Wrestling having been a personal ”playground” for me when I ran the ship like a tyrant, as he put it. What he fails to realize and give me credit for is, that I opened numerous doors for not only him, but also a litany of other Finnish talents, when I was at the helm. It was through my personal sacrifices, connections and labors, that everyone got a piece of the pie. I was the baker, the roster were the beneficiaries, sitting at the round table, waiting to be served. Of course Karhula doesn’t want anyone to see this picture, because it completely destroys his argument and attempt to discredit me. And be it said, that every single business and organization needs a clear-cut leader at the top, someone whose word is iron law, so that everyone underneath has a clear direction and concise marching orders, as to what is expected of them to make the co-operative effort work.

The truth is, that the yuppie, liberal, millennial roster simply didn’t like the way StarBuck ran the game, which was LIKE A WRESTLING PROMOTION. After 25 years spent out in the mat game worldwide, you’d think these kids would have had the faith to understand a time-tested pro was at the helm, running things like they had been run for numerous decades in our industry. But no, they wanted a culture club, a little after-school play park where everyone got their wishes granted and everyone was made to feel like a special snowflake. And who better to choose to lead a juvenile lot like that, than one of their own?

karhula and starbuck standoff

Karhula’s a snake in the grass. He’s a young man full of resentment and jealousy. Where he could have gone the extra mile like I did in making his career on a global level, he simply dreamed and talked. He didn’t put in the sacrifice and effort needed, nor did he show the must-have heart and ballsy daring that blind leaps of faith require to make it in any chosen endeavor.

No. Karhula simply rode the coattails of upper management, expecting to be treated like a special charity case or favored child. He thought that his inherent talent warranted him all the blessings that would be passed his way from those in power. Someone else laid down the pavement that he was then able to stroll on. And like a greedy, self-serving child, he just expected more and more. Chalk it up to a false sense of entitlement for a millenial child.

Then, when he saw his opening in late 2015, Karhula realized that now was his time. The Finnish wrestling roster had changed dramatically since the golden days of the early 2010’s in FCF, when under my auspices, we were the ONLY office out of Europe to have a working relationship with a main Japanese wrestling promotion. A lot of the veteran talents from that era had either moved on to live in other countries or had hung it up, moving on in their lives to other endeavors and vocations.

Now, a new stock of upstarts and mid-card hopefuls were filling up the bulk of the roster. The internal climate was right for an overhaul. Youth beckoned unto youth and like called out to like. The pipe dreams of one became the pipe dreams of many. Karhula had his uprising, captaining his grand bastard mutiny, and so he was chosen by the disoriented, disenfranchised younglings that he helped coach up, as their new spiritual leader.

In came the liberal, soft, democratic values of Juhana Karhula. Out went the cold, hard realities of 25 years spent in the global wrestling industry and the conservative leadership of StarBuck.

Well, guess what? On December 2nd in Helsinki, when Talvisota XII takes place, this isn’t just going to be another wrestling match. It’s not some ”storyline” for the fans to amuse themselves by. No. This is going to be a personal war of attrition and I’m going to take deep-rooted pleasure in breaking one Juhana ”King Kong” Karhula into pieces.

I could give a damn whether anyone sides with me that night. Times have changed, and so be it. I’m going into that ring to annihilate and decimate Juhana Karhula. I’m going to strip him of his title belt, I’m going to forcefully eviscerate his false sense of ”honor” and I’m going to make an example of him in front of the entire, youth-infested FCF locker room.

December 2nd will be known as the day that a false leader, captaining his own, personal mutiny against the father of an entire cultural phenomenon in the country of Finland, meets his own, due demise.

die karhula

In every man’s life, there comes a time when the wheat is separated from the chaff and a personal agenda is born.  A time when those he has brought up, fathered and mentored turn their backs on him.  A time when he himself sees how he has become the villain in minds of those who abide by the current, liberal undertow of society.

For years upon years, I spearheaded the professional wrestling business in Finland.  As its pioneer, I did everything within my power to take this fine fighting art in this remote nook of the world and make it into something truly remarkable.

I achieved that and much more in my tenure as the heart and soul of Finnish pro wrestling.  Since the inception of FCF Wrestling, Finland’s one and only pro wrestling promotion, in 2006, I worked my ass off to put the company on the European wrestling map.  And I did.

Through my arduous efforts, FCF Wrestling became a hallmark name on the European Wrestling scene in the Y2K era.  I was able to negotiate and work as flourishing deal with both the SMASH and WNC wrestling promotions of Japan at the turn of the 2010s.  We, as FCF Wrestling, were the only foreign promotion in the Land of the Rising Sun to have a working deal with a Japanese office outside of ROH and TNA out of the USA.  We were the only ones out of Europe to enjoy such a lavish standing.  And guess who was the workhorse behind all of that?

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The horse that pulled the cart for everyone for over a decade (photo: Marko Simonen)

With one StarBuck at the helm of FCF, our organization spawned a litany of export talents that would go on to enjoy massive success across Europe, in Asia and in North America.  Talents such as Heimo Ukonselkä, Pasi Suominen, Kristian Kurki, Valentine, Kageman Guro, Stark Adder, Aurora, El Excentrico, Jessica Love, Mikko Maestro, Petrov, plus a certain wrestler named Juhana Karhula, all got their chance to shine abroad under Captain StarBuck’s gutsy and ambitious leadership.

Alas, this brings me to 2017 and the aforementioned individual, Juhana Karhula.  Nowadays, Karhula finds himself at the helm of the FCF ship, as its champion and its head coach.  He’s gotten the locker room to rally behind him and aspire to his vision.  In short, he’s become quite the influence.  An influence that has turned a whole horde of children against their own father, as it were.

Back in 2008, an infamous couple ran FCF Wrestling for a spell as the promoters of the organization on paper.  They hated me.  Absolutely despised me.  They were, for lack of a better term, a cancer in the bones of Finnish pro wrestling.  They were about to smoke me out of FCF altogether in the fall of 2008 and put an 18-year-old Juhana Karhula, who had been wrestling for three years up to that point only in Finland, as head coach and matchmaker.  This plan didn’t pan out at the time, as the locker room got smart to what was happening and this antagonistic couple ended up leaving the organization and passing it on to a new leadership back then, which was outlined in detail in my official autobiography, Battleground Valhalla, out now in print and as a Kindle download through Crowbar Press from the USA.

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Karhula surely has as much attrition for my person as I do for him (photo: Marko Simonen)

Juhana Karhula, then wrestling under a mask as Ibo Ten, was all game for the coup back in 2008 when it was presented to him.  He literally salivated at the prospect of filling some mighty big shoes, replacing the author and founding father of Finnish pro wrestling in a key position.  When things didn’t pan out, the young man fell into a depression as his world fell apart.  For years, he became a shadow of himself, struggling to establish his identity in the annals of pro wrestling and trying to come to grips with the fact that he’d have to learn to live with the fact that old StarBuck wasn’t leaving the helm any time soon.

Time passed and new faces came into the FCF organization, just as the tides of society were changing also.  The societal norms, as it were, were changing.  No longer could you call a spade a spade, and no longer was black black or white white.  It became an age of overt and exaggerated, twisted and insistent political correctness.  It became liberalism up the ass and all manner of inane “tolerance” talk.  It became the day and age of the blind willing to be lead by the blind.  An age when everybody wanted to walk to the beat of the weakest common denominator, so as not to make anybody feel excluded and left out.  In short, it became what we now hold to be modern, social justice warrior infested, virtue-signaling society.

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I’ll break anyone who steps between me and my quest for vengeance (pic: Marko Simonen)

The world and old school, clear-cut approach of StarBuck was no longer relevant.  The new, younger crop of FCF wrestlers wanted a leader that resounded with their values system and liberal views.  They wanted the soft, lily-livered approach.  The one that treated everyone with kid gloves and gave out prizes to everybody, just for showing up, instead of for achievements.

And so the old faithful rock, Captain StarBuck, was rolled aside to let in the new “messiah” of FCF, Juhana Karhula.  What started as a seed sown in 2008 finally came to fruition in 2017, almost a decade later.

Now, it’s war.  It’s damn personal.  Not only have this little rat pack of current Finnish wrestlers chosen their leader, they have also spawned a lethal agenda.  They have let the tempest in.  With a vengeance.

This past weekend, on Saturday night, September 2nd in Helsinki, FCF Wrestling held it’s Wrestling Show Live event at Pressa nightclub.  For the second time since the whole of FCF turned their backs on me, I made a personal statement to the reigning champion and face of FCF, Juhana Karhula.  The first time was back in May of this year, when I cost him his match with Germany’s monsterous Demolition Davies.  This time, I cost him his match against the Beast from Sweden, in only 15-seconds of ill-fated fame.  Afterwards, Karhula lost it and attacked me in the dressing room, which was caught on camera and can be seen on the FCF Wrestling page on Facebook.

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A world of hurt is about to rain down on Juhana Karhula and no one can stop what is going to take place (photo: Marko Simonen)

I won’t rest until I’ve done in and done away with Juhana “King Kong” Karhula.  I will haunt him to the ends of the Earth, until I have my vengeance and my personal vendetta is fulfilled.  Watch me.

The folks in Finland have the chance to see the Valhalla Nordic Wrestling Championship defended for the first time on Finnish soil, since I cemented my status as the undisputed champion back on July 8, when, as the interim champ, I defeated Sweden’s Timmy Force to eliminate the “interim” part of the equation.

In that tremendous July 8 encounter back in Stockholm, I took Timmy to 30-minutes of pain, blues and agony (although, I have to say the young man kept hanging in there, putting up one hell of a fight), before I put him away with my world-famous jumping spike piledriver.

StarBuck vs Timmy Force VALHALLA Nordic Championship 6

The finish from July 8 in Stockholm (photo: Fredrik Streiffert)

That match was contested under the auspices of STHLM Wrestling, and under their rules, my finisher is banned, due to it’s risky nature.  Nonetheless, the official in charge of the match failed to see me hit my move, and the rest, as they say, is history.

Now, on September 2 in Helsinki at FCF Wrestling’s Wrestling Show Live! event, the main event features a rematch between young Timmy and myself.  If our all-time classic showdown in Stockholm on July 8 serves as any indicator, this rematch should be off-the-charts!

The place: Pressa nightclub
Eteläinen rautatiekatu 4, 00100 Helsinki

Doors 16:00
Showtime 17:00

Tickets in advance through Tiketti 16,50€/11,50€
Tickets at the door 20€/15€

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The news was just released officially this week that I would be facing my former protégé Mikko Maestro at the annual flagship supershow in Finnish professional wrestling, Talvisota XI – which translates to Winter War 11 – this coming February 18 at the Nosturi club in Helsinki, as promoted by FCF Wrestling.

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I was there at the inaugural Winter War on December 2, 2006 – an event that I coined and created back in the day to be the Finnish wrestling equivalent of Wrestlemania – and here I am over a decade later, turning another page.

This match-up against Maestro is significant on a few levels.  Firstly, it’s arguably the biggest match to date in the six-year career of young Maestro.  Secondly, I took the kid under my wing back in early 2013 to groom him for the years ahead, seeing that his charisma was catching on with the Finnish wrestling audience.  This made him my protégé, a pet project that I invested considerable time and coaching into, and Maestro finally was able to up the ante and make a breakthrough in 2016 against top competition like Ivan Markov of Russia, Mark Kodiak of Holland, Swedish champion Harley Rage and Heimo the Wildman here in Finland.  Thirdly, Maestro has shown himself to be ambitious in the fact that he has gone on to countries like Denmark, Germany and the USA to gain more experience.  This last bit is something I’d like to elaborate on.

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Maestro was able to defeat Heimo the Wildman in a Last Man Standing match at Talvisota X in March 2016, which gave him major momentum.

Every talent out there with any inkling of ambition will take the chance to spread their wings and test their mettle in the shark-infested waters of global pro wrestling.  Many young wrestlers will end up having to pay their own way just to get exposure, build a resume and get noticed, as they build up their personal value in order for a booker or promoter out there to invest in them.  If they are lucky, and to any degree own a moderate modicum of talent, they will be able to make headway in a very convoluted age in their aspirations to become stars in the world of pro wrestling.

Maestro has shown ambition.  He has gone out there and found a way to get noticed and get booked where other contemporaries, even those with greater in-ring talent, have fallen short.  Maestro has shown heart, even over-ambition at times, if you ask me.  Nonetheless, he’s been able to consistently climb the ladder rung by rung.  That brings us to Talvisota XI / Winter War 11 on February 18.

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Mikko Maestro wrestling a marquee bout in California during 2015.

As with any young talent, everyone has role models that they aspire to pattern themselves after and learn from.  At the start of my pro wrestling career in 1994, my biggest influence was Ric Flair.  I believe that for many of my generation, growing up a teen in the 1980s, Ric Flair was the consummate pro to look up to, if you had any understanding of the complete package that made a pro wrestler.  For the Millenials to a large degree, that role model became Shawn Michaels and a bit later on The Rock and Stone Cold.  In Finland, for many, including one Mikko Maestro, that role model was StarBuck, the founding father of Finnish pro wrestling.

I recall a young Mikko Maestro back around 2009, when I was cycling near Munkkiniemi Beach in Helsinki.  It was there that I ran into the kid for the first time.  As I was riding by, getting in my cardio, Maestro recognized me as he walked down the street and yelled out “StarBuck!”.  I simply smiled, recognizing his fanship, and kept on cycling. One year later, he showed up for wrestling schooling.

As a mentor, I took Mikko Maestro as high as I could.  The rest, of course, was all up to him.  At the Winter War event in 2013, I took Maestro as my tag partner for a heated, key match-up against Stark Adder and his protégé, Ricky Vendetta.  The vet and the pup against the vet and the pup, as it was, back then.  It was the starting point for my on-hands mentorship of one Mikko Maestro.

Time passed, Maestro gained experience and confidence, and alas, in September of last year, he made a bold challenge.  Mikko Maestro wanted to publicly challenge the man that taught him, the role model that he aspired to pattern his career after, and see if he was up to the task.  I figured this day would eventually come, but I don’t think Mikko Maestro is anywhere near ready to take on the old war dog yet.  He still has some miles to go before he can realistically hang at my level, and believe me when I tell you: he’s going to need all the help he can get, ‘cos the fans and their cheers won’t make a bit of difference when he finds himself overwhelmed by 23 years of ring experience on the other end of the spectrum.

Well, when he last needed my help, I was there.  But… he didn’t listen.  At the crucial, key point in Maestro’s match against Ivan Markov of Russia in December of last year, the kid chose to disrespect the deal that we had set forth going into the match.  In short, he went into business for himself, disregarding his coach, and pulled out his ridiculous, asinine “stinkface” maneuver, which he found funny enough to rip off of WWE Hall of Famer, Rikishi.  In a serious match-setting, where a killer like the Russian Markov was present, I expressly told Maestro to leave the gimmicks, bells and whistles at home.  But no.  He had to take the forbidden fruit.  He had to dally out onto thin ice.  He had to do things his own way.  And it was at that point, that I disowned Mikko Maestro as a protégé.

There comes a time in life when every person is going to have to stand on their own, no supports and no crutches to be had.  This is that time for Mikko Maestro.  At Talvisota XI, my former protégé is going to find out that legends don’t die, they just get better with age.

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On July 29 at Ropecon (Role-Playing Convention), to be held at the Helsinki Expo and Exhibition Center, I will take on my Spandex Sapiens arch-rival, the gender-bending Jessica Love one last time.  I say one last time because this time, I will stamp out my opponent for good.

SB vs Jessica ROPECON

Be there when the last bell chimes.

Last time we fought, at the LGBT crowd’s Eurogames on July 1 in Helsinki, I broke Jessica Love’s arm.  Like the old saying goes about a one-legged man in an ass-kicking contest, so it goes with Jessica Love in a fist-fight.  Now, I wouldn’t put it past my adversary to show up with arm in sling, because Jessica is just that thick in the head, daring to brave danger head-on.  Actually, that is quite admirable.  But it will also prove to be Jessica Love’s downfall on July 29.

Now, a lot of people are still asking why, much like Anakin Skywalker turning into Darth Vader, why did StarBuck turn to the dark side?  I find this quite amusing actually.

I said this at the Eurogames event on the microphone in front of the masses, and I will say it here again: I didn’t turn my back on anybody.  I have stood for traditional, straight, masculine values as long as I have been around.  Certainly, my entire media career I have toted the same line and stood for the same, unwavering cause.  I have never flinched or backed down, even in the face of adversity and backlash.  Now, in 2016, when my movie Spandex Sapiens came out, people had a chance to take and pick a side.  You could either side with my counterpart, the transgender, liberal, Jessica Love, or you could side with a real man in the iconic, conservative StarBuck.  It was really a simple choice.  Whatever resonated with you and your world, you could freely choose black or white, left or right.  And the people chose Jessica Love.

Looking back, I can say that I have not changed at all.  I have stayed the course.  Society and the flavor of the day has changed.  I have lived long enough as the hero to see myself become the villain.  The people have chosen.  The people have spoken.

So it is now, on July 29 at Ropecon, that I will do what a vigilante and lone wolf would do in terms of personal agenda.  I will put down, once and for all, the ambiguous hero of your modern day liberal Finland and western world at large.  I will trample underfoot Jessica Love for the final time, arm in a sling and all.  And I will do it without remorse.

You, the audience, have given rise to the anti-hero.  Now deal with it.

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Spandex Sapiens movie theater showtimes this week:

Helsinki: Tennispalatsi
July 19, Tuesday 18:15

Tampere: Arthouse Cinema Niagara
July 21, Thursday 20:30

It’s rather peculiar that I wrestled at a Pride event yesterday.  A Cro-magnon, retrosexual, hetero heel, the worst possible prototype villain of the queer culture, wrestling at Eurogames.  Held in downtown Helsinki under the blazing hot summer sun, Eurogames was an LGBT event, which expressly wanted to see “The Rebel” StarBuck vs. Jessica Love center stage, stemming from the hype surrounding my Spandex Sapiens movie in Finnkino theaters currently.

As most all of you should know by know, Jessica Love is Europe’s only transgender female pro wrestler.  In the Spandex Sapiens movie, Jessica Love plays my worst adversary, especially from the point of values and societal values.  We are polar opposites, like east and west.  Jessica is the all-allowing liberal modern-day representative, whereas I am the conservative caveman who holds on to black and white principles and ideals.

Well, wrestle I did.  And not just wrestle.  I used the opportunity presented to make some of the most poignant social comments to be heard publicly in today’s suffocating, politically correct environment.  I let loose and let it be known, that the men these days are no longer men, nor are the women any longer women.  They are confused.  Not just gender-confused, I mean confused in general.  The statistics prove it!  Look at the depression in our society.  Look at the kids, how lost they are in terms of their own identities.  Look at the mass divorce rates and the ever-growing numbers of single moms.  I made my point loud and clear, and the Pride-friendly crowd on hand did NOT like it one single bit.

Sb preaches

StarBuck preaches the truth at Eurogames (photo: Pasi Murto)

Yet, it was hard to refute what I had to say.  I heard boos, sure.  But not the kind of heart-felt boos that come from disdain and spite.  They were moreso boos that towed the political line of the day, trained monkey kinds of boos.  I believe people in their hearts knew, that I was telling the truth.  It gets harder to hate a person when they tell you the truth and the truth is simply inconvenient for you.

So there I was, taking bullets in the chest and in the back for every traditional, hetero person out there, who does not have the spine or the balls to stand up for what they believe in.  I went head-long into battle, alone!  I sent out a load of emails prior to Eurogames, urging traditional, conservative folks and organizations of that ilk to come out and support me, “The Rebel” StarBuck, as I duked it out with Jessica Love in front of the entire LGBT community in Helsinki at this Eurogames Pride event.  Guess what?  NO ONE dared to show up.  Not one, single group or backer of the traditional nuclear family unit showed up to support StarBuck.  For this, the entire traditional, conservative front in Finland should hang their heads in shame!

I went into that match yesterday with Jessica Love a one-man army.  A legend in my lifetime.  A man who stood, where no others dared to stand.  A lone wolf in a strange land.  And I destroyed Jessica Love!  I broke Jessica Love’s arm in the process.  Boo-hoo.  I made a statement, because extreme times call for extreme measures.  You are going to remember my name!  StarBuck.  Get it right.  It has nothing to do with coffee.

Jessica Love got to take a trip to the hospital after our match and all of a sudden, the LGBT crowd had lost their hero.  Now they had a real reason to hate me.  But as the saying goes, the best direction to ride a horse is in the direction that it is already headed.  Haters are going to hate anyway.  Give them their anti-hero.  Give them what they deserve.

FCF Instagram

Jessica Love was scheduled to face me a second time in the main event of the Eurogames wrestling program later yesterday night.  Well, there was no Jessica Love in sight, so out comes King Kong Karhula, defending his friend.  This, in and of itself, has more to it than can be seen at surface value.  Karhula recently wrote a blog of his own about his friendship with Jessica, telling of how close they are and have been for many years, even when they were feuding.  In the pro wrestling business, that is called breaking kayfabe, and it is considered a cardinal sin.  Karhula not only pissed all over the traditions of our business and age-old tradition, he conveniently went “into business for himself”, trying to push Jessica’s starpower in my Spandex Sapiens movie through aligning himself at this time with my transgender foe.  I saw it as shameless mooching on Karhula’s part, reeking of desperation to get his own rub off the whole shebang.

Be that as it may, since Jessica Love could not wrestle with a freshly-broken arm, in comes Karhula to take Jessica’s place in the main event against Yours Truly!  Toting a gay pride flag on his way to the ring, I really wondered where Karhula’s true feelings and allegiances lay.  I found it both amusing and pathetic.  But I will say this: Juhana Karhula came to fight.  He was incensed, full of piss and vinegar.  He attacked me with the kind of emotion that is rarely felt, and the people on hand felt it too.  The heat was off the charts.  Karhula was a man possessed, tearing into me as we brawled, before I could turn the match in my favor and run him head-first into the ring post.

My wife Diana happened to be at ringside with her new camera, taking pics:

I was able to find one single sympathizer to the traditional, conservative family cause, and that was FCF Wrestling’s Teuvo.  Although he’s a beer-swigging hick, Teuvo is a man of principle.  He still believes in black and white, too.  So I had him come out with a Straight Pride sign and act as my one, single backer at this LGBT Eurogames event.  Teuvo even got in some kicks of his own on Karhula, once I left him laying at ringside.

I blasted Karhula with all I had, having a hell of a time doing it, too!  The crowd was irate and hot as hell.  I hammered Karhula until we both got knocked down center-ring.  Karhula had that entire Eurogames crowd behind him, as he rallied a comeback against me.  Teuvo made his presence known at the most-critical moment, blasting Karhula with an open beer can in the face, allowing me to capitalize on Karhula’s misstep and roll him up for the pin and win.  Sure, he got up and dropped both Teuvo and I with a Death Valley Driver afterwards, but my win was already in the history books, right in front of the most antagonistic crowd that I could ever imagine wrestling in front of.

My main event win was not only a win for StarBuck, it was a win for the entire Straight Pride cause.  Where no one has the guts to stand up and make some noise for what they really believe in, should it deter from the ruling PC thought of the day, because they fear public sentiment and others’ public opinions so much, one man took the bull by the horns and led the charge.  The man that took the bullets and arrows for everyone else, for those who didn’t have the guts to stand when called upon, that man stood tall in the end.  Isn’t that what an anti-hero is?  It sure as hell is in my book.

Here are some stellar clips from my match against Jessica Love as well as the other matches at Eurogames, filmed and edited by the talented Juha Sihtola of Mad-Cam!

Yesterday, the long-awaited feature film story about me, Spandex Sapiens, came out in Finnkino movie theaters across the country of Finland.  To celebrate and promote this monumental occasion, FCF Wrestling held a 6-hour wrestle-thon, outdoors in downtown Helsinki, smack-dab in front of the city’s main movie theater, Tennispalatsi.

In the main event, to tie in to the Spandex Sapiens movie release, I fought against transsexual Jessica Love in a battle of both values and polar opposites, as Jessica is the main, free-thinking, liberal antagonist vs. my traditional, conservative, masculine prototype in the movie.

As I wrote in one of my latest blogs, I really believe that the people at large on a societal level will find themselves choosing a side in this movie and the themes and values systems presented therein.  This was proven in blazing, vivid colors last night on the premises of Kampin Keskus, where the wrestling ring was set up in front of Tennispalatsi theater, when I got into the ring to take on Jessica Love.

SB vs Jessica Kamppi03 by Aki Mäki

Telling the truth, and having a whole audiences mindset turn against me. (photo: Aki Mäki)

I gave a heated and hearty promo prior to our match, where I chagrined over the lack of moral absolutes and black-and-white principles in our modern society.  I challenged the crowd on hand to look into their souls and ask themselves if they really exemplified real masculinity as men, and real femininity as women, seeing how messed up our modern culture is in all its ambiguity.  The people started to turn against me, almost as if they were programmed to do so.  Brainwashed by the mass media and public sentiment of the day, the crowd became an angry mob.  Someone told me afterwards, that they were afraid that someone from the audience would rush the ring amidst my match with Jessica Love.

SB vs Jessica Kamppi02 by Aki Mäki

Taking control of the match! (photo: Aki Mäki)

Jessica Love and I had a damn war of attrition (hell, I even penned the lyrics to a song by the same name by my thrash metal band Angel of Sodom!), in which we tore into each other with the kind of malicious intent that only two polar opposites could create!  The ring was slippery as hell, as the sky began to sprinkle rain just as our match began.  The canvas might as well have been an ice skating rink, making it damn hard to maneuver and get one’s timing down.  It was risky all around, but the sheer personal nature of our battle overrode all else.  The people present could certainly feel the tension in the air.  It was as real as it gets, folks!

SB vs Jessica Kamppi01 by Xeniya Balsara

Balsara.net captures the raw emotion of the finish of our match!

In the end, I had such trouble getting my footing because of the rain, that Jessica was able to crack me with a nasty enzugiri, which put me down on the mat.  Jessica climbed the ropes to come off the top onto me with a senton splash, which I was able to roll out of the way from.  I then immediately hit my trademark spike piledriver for the inevitable pinfall and win.

The audience erupted in boos and jeers.  The people had spoken.  A virgin wrestling audience, peoples of all different nationalities, chose a side.  They went with the liberal, free-thinking brainwashing that they have been programmed to believe.  Somehow, I am not surprised.  As the referee in our match, Teemu, stated a few weeks ago on social media in regards to my person, “You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain.”

Spandex FB

This is only the beginning.  Just as the theater run for Spandex Sapiens has just begun this weekend, so the issue between myself and Jessica Love goes on.  The next time we meet in the ring, it will be in front of Jessica Love’s own LGBT demographic.  On July 1 in Helsinki, an event called Eurogames will take place in the city center. It’s a huge sporting event, in conjunction with the annual Pride parade in Helsinki.

There could be no greater heel than StarBuck when it comes to this event.  There could be no more sympathetic a babyface than Jessica Love when it comes to this event.  When the gates open to the public at 12:00 on July 1, right out of the blocks, this war of attrition gets a second chapter.  Jessica Love vs. StarBuck takes center stage at Eurogames, and it’s going to be a cold day in Hell-sinki for my transgender opponent when he/she goes down again, only this time, in front of his/her own people.

Spandex Sapiens Eurogames 2016

StarBuck vs. Jessica Love – chapter 2 – Eurogames, Helsinki – July 1

For anyone who missed the mass media exposure for Spandex Sapiens in Finland this week, here are a plethora of links to check out!

http://www.iltasanomat.fi/viihde/art-2000001202020.html

http://www.hs.fi/urheilu/a1466055697006

http://areena.yle.fi/1-3518002

http://www.aamulehti.fi/kulttuuri/dokumentti-loysi-showpainikehasta-kivikautisen-miehen-ja-sateenkaarilipun-liehuttajan/

http://www.radiorock.fi/#!/post/5763d6960089b403009a2303

http://www.episodi.fi/elokuvat/spandex-sapiens/

http://www.katsomo.fi/#!/jakso/626288

Last night in Helsinki we almost had a tragedy take place.  FCF Wrestling held it’s 10th anniversary of Finland’s equivalent of Wrestlemania, Talvisota X (Winter War 10).  With 500 frantic fans showing up to our mega-show, we had nine matches slated on the card, with the FCF title bout between champion Valentine and challenger King Kong Karhula in the main event.

However, earlier yesterday, we got word that my opponent for the evening, Chaos of Denmark, had been delayed in Copenhagen.  His SAS flight had left for Helsinki and had been turned back after take-off due to a fuel shortage.  SAS rerouted him through Prague later in the day, only to make it to Helsinki airport for 22:30!

Now just me personally, talking not only for myself but for the fans on hand, and in light of the significance of my imprint on the Finnish pro wrestling scene in general, as the pioneer of the sport in our country, for my match to have been left off the card of this 10th anniversary show would have been an all-time low.

Back in 2006, when the first, inaugural Winter War took place in Vantaa, Finland, I was the main event against Bernard Vandamme of Belgium for the Eurostars European championship.  At that event, I won the European title for the first time in my storied career, putting Finnish pro wrestling and FCF as a company on the continental wrestling industry map.

bernard powerslam

The night I took the European title off of Bernard Vandamme in 2006

Now, 10 years later, the boys that were in the opening match of the very first Winter War in 2006 found themselves at the top of the card, in the advertised main event of Winter War / Talvisota X this year, a decade later.  Valentine and King Kong Karhula had one hell of a match last night, which stands to be applauded on all levels, and I was amazed at the public reaction to the newly-turned Karhula as a babyface.  It seems that the Finnish fans really vouched for him and have taken him as a fan favorite fore-runner.  Pitted against one of the greatest heels ever – if not THE greatest heel ever – out of the Nordics, Valentine, both challenger and champion tore the house down with a multi-faceted, highly intricate and masterful match.  Valentine retained his strap, but Karhula won over the entire audience with a moral victory.

About half-way through Valentine’s match with Karhula, Chaos arrived at the Töölö Sports Hall, rushed to the venue via taxi to make it for our advertised match.  He had changed into his wrestling gear during the ride to town, and he was primed and ready to go 15 minutes before our match went on.  Talk about a near-miss!

My Eye of the Tiger theme music began to play and I wondered if Chaos and I could follow the stellar main event match set by Valentine and Karhula.  Still, as a 22-year veteran, I knew I could be certain of what I could produce.  I was also dead-certain of what my opponent could produce.  We had an issue to attend to, a rivalry that crossed national boundaries.  I wasn’t expecting a high-flying match or a technical showcase.  No, what I was expecting was a WAR.  And a war I got!

Chaos lambasted me from behind with a steel chair from the blindside as I made my ring entrance, beating me six shades of senseless before I even knew what was going on!  The man tore into me, literally like a pit bull, unrelenting and vicious in his assault.  I found myself literally fighting for my life in there.  There was no surcease, no slowing down, as Chaos just kept the pressure and heat on me.

Yet, I wasn’t succumbing.  I wasn’t laying down or staying down.  This was Winter War 10, dammit!  Winter War, my personal brainchild and concept, which has since been branded and recognized as the most important pro wrestling event annually in the country of Finland!

StarBuck vs Chaos Winter War 10 (3)

Chaos blasts me with a mean uppercut! (photo: Timo Muilu)

My adrenaline started kicking in.  I struggled hard to clear my head of the cobwebs of Chaos’ vicious assault.  I got in one punch… then another… and another.  I rallied hard, fighting back with the intestinal fortitude of a dozen Finnish war veterans that fought hard to retain Finland’s independence in 1940.  I wasn’t just fighting for my professional wrestling heritage in this country, I was fighting for every person at the Töölö Sports Hall that rallied with me.  Every punch and blow that I could land was delivered with the force and emotional investment of the people that believed in me and my personal contribution to pro wrestling in Finland since 2003.  All of a sudden, my fight became larger than life itself in that moment.

StarBuck vs Chaos Winter War 10 (2)

A brief rally that didn’t last too long, but did the damage intended! (photo: Timo Muilu)

I finished the first Winter War with my head held high back in 2006, and I wasn’t willing to leave the ring last night with anything less than that same feeling and raw emotion.  I finally nailed Chaos in the face with a boot as he charged me in the corner.  With the Dane stung, I blasted him with a second rope clothesline that would have done former WWF world champion Bret “Hitman” Hart proud.

After a spirited last-ditch, desperation comeback, I got caught out on the outside of the ring by Chaos, as he ran my kidneys hard into the ring apron.  Rolling me back into the ring, Chaos hit his trademark moonsault and damn near crushed my legs on the landing.  It would be hard to kick out, with my thighs knotted up, but kick out I did!

TSX Chaos moonsault

Chaos hits a mean moonsault on my fallen corpus (photo: Xeniya Balsara)

 

Chaos picked me up for a side back breaker and then ascended the ropes for another huge moonsault, which he hit perfectly across my chest cavity, knocking the wind out of me.  He went for the cover, but just barely, I managed to kick out once again.

At this point, Chaos seemed to be scrambling for ideas, so he went after the steel chair that he used before the start of the match to beat me senseless.  Bringing the chair to the ring, he prepared to blast me with it, but I hit a superkick into the chair, sending the steel into Chaos’ face and knocking him senseless for a change.

Now was my time.  It was now or never.  I hoisted Chaos for my trademark spike piledriver and dropped him with the very maneuver that has put away competition all over the world during my wrestling travels in 20 countries worldwide.  But… he kicked out!!!

TSX piledriver

My piledriver has a match-ending odds on favorite rate of about 98% (photo: Xeniya Balsara)

I was stunned.  Hardly ever had anyone… anyone at all… kicked out of my spike piledriver.  In Japan, “The Japanese Buzzsaw” Tajiri managed to kick out of my piledriver once, and once only.  On that night, Tajiri became the FCF champion back in 2010.  But such are so scarce occasions, that they only happen once in a blue moon, or perhaps, as with most, only once in a lifetime.

I blasted Chaos with yet another spike piledriver and that was finally enough to put away the tough bastard at Winter War 10, as the audience counted with every slap of the referee’s hand against the mat, as Chaos’ shoulders were pinned for the 1-2-3.  And my goodness, the sound of the pop that the live audience emitted at that point could have been registered on the Richter Scale!

What could have been a disastrous night on many levels turned into one of the most satisfying and memorable matches of my 22+ year pro wrestling career.  Thanks to everyone who was on hand, and for those who weren’t, there is a DVD of this event in the works, which will be out in the coming months for sale!

Winter War veterans

The FCF Wrestling veteran crew that has taken part in every single Talvisota / Winter War to 2006 -2016: (left to right) King Kong Karhula, StarBuck, Valentine, Stark Adder (photo: Satu Tapaturma)